Swimming Back to the Surface

This picture completely encapsulates how I've felt the past week. I've been drowning in all of these books I have to read but been too exhausted ( from being sick) to swim to the surface and make some progress on

them or anything else. But yesterday, I swam my way to the surface! I had to submit my research proposal for my semester long research paper in my English class. My Professor is all about having questions lead the writing. Which has been interesting because when I write, I like to write with the security of having an answer and the evidence to back it up. But, with a research paper, the point is the discovery--the journey of seeing what happens and going with the flow.

I'm not going to lie. I've been looking toward Monday the 13th with ever growing fear and dread.

Writing: to Love or to Hate?

(Public Domain) The Bonfire of Hatred and Fear

Once upon a time in third grade, I found writing fun. My teacher made sure we all had the traditional wide-ruled, black& white composition notebooks, and gave us fun and creative prompts. Once a week we would all share what we wrote. I liked the freedom of it. I didn't have to worry about intros, conclusions and passive voice.  My teacher eventually taught us the standard 5 paragraph style to prepare for the essay test, but I didn't feel the pressure then.


By the time I got to high school, my love of writing warped. And by warped I mean my grade-driven panic and tendency to over think nearly strangled it to death and then lit it on fire as an inauguration of hatred and fear.